Withstanding the Fire...

Turns out that what I wrote about that verse in Corinthians a while ago was really a promise about the semester.

I do feel like I've been put through some fire. Fire reveals infrastructure. It reveals what we're made of. God and I have both seen my infrastructure, I feel. Flaws? Definitely. I've found out that I'm not necessarily a person of my word, and I want to be. I think this has been a part of me for a while, but it has (in my mind and observation) come more apparent this semester.

I'm also a bit of a liar. And that was disappointing.

But may those things be burned off. May all that is left be that which will withstand fire.

Getting what He Paid For?

This semester has been challenging. Lots to balance and keep up with. Some of the negative aspects of myself as a person have shown up this semester. All I have found myself wanting to do is to go and curl up in bed and sleep it all away. I know this is anything but a solution. I know. I have also noticed myself (as though I am somehow removed from my behavior) slacking off.

"Just once won't really matter..."

A grain of rice is small, but yet it is a staple food for most of the world.

This morning, I confronted myself (again, it seems as though I have two sides and one is removed from the other).

Being a Christian, I believe that Jesus's death atoned for my imperfections, and brought me from out of the depths and the grave and into light and life. He paid a huge price for me to have life, and I accepted the deal.

Though it sounds harsh and material, is Jesus getting what He paid for out of me? Does the way I live my life day in and day out reflect well on the label I bear: "Christian" or "little Christ"?

A friend of mine blogged about the notion of being set apart, and it lines up with what I realized this morning in many ways.

As I decide what to do with my life, is it worthy of the label I bear?

Hope: (noun) confident desire

On a late night round with one of my fellow Resident Assistants, I was asking him some typical "get to know you" questions. One of these questions included the inevitable "What are three things that are very important to you?" Long story short, that question was turned back upon me.

Initially, I would have spit out the typical, "God, family, friends" answer. But instead, and I forget the first two things mentioned, I included hope.

Why? What is hope? This intangible, warm, fuzzy word. Why is it important?

Recently, I got hung up on my own mortality. There is something so frightening about realizing that one day, I will die. I wonder what that will be like, to have life leave my body. To have the world go dim. Is there hope? When I thought about this all, I found myself wondering "Is this whole Christianity thing real?"

All of the eggs into one basket. All of my hope into one man.

Is there something after death?

Hope was brought up on a Sunday morning recently by my pastor. Hope gives substance to faith.

Hope is vital. Without the hope that Jesus was who He said He was, then what hope is there?

A few more reflections on hope. One is from Romans 5:1-5.

"Since we have been justified through faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, through whom we have gained access by faith into this grace in which we now stand. And we rejoice in the hope of the glory of God. Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because god has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom He has given us."

Hope does not disappoint us. It helps us to finish the race.

A final thought, from Glenn Hatcher's book Why God Thinks He Can Use You, hope is open-eyed dreams. He pulls in this magnificent quote from T.E. Lawrence -

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds awake in the day to find that it was vanity; but the dreamers of day are dangerous men, for they may act their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible."

I'm afraid I don't have much of a conclusion to offer. Just thoughts.